Dear women who chose to march -

I have had many thoughts running through my head the last 72 hours, many regarding the Women’s March.  I laid in bed Sunday night for hours with sleep evading me.  I just couldn’t shut my brain down.  I decided I needed to record my thoughts on paper. So, this is me looking fear in the face and singing my song! 

To My Fellow Sisters,

Please know how grateful I am that you have the freedom to march for something you believe in.  However, let it be reflected that you did NOT march for all women!  I have read the open letter to women saying that you marched for me even though I didn’t want you to, and you were happy to do so.  Let me again clearly state – you DID NOT march for me.  Let me explain why.

No law they may pass or repeal in Washington, no speech that is given, and no protest that will take place can change one very powerful fact – I am a daughter of a King!  Being the daughter of a king is something that I take very serious, and one that comes with responsibilities.  I treat others the way He would want me to treat them, even if they don’t treat me the same way.  If I want people to respect me, I must dress, speak, and act respectful.  However, one thing that is often missed, is that the first step is to respect myself.  I am free to make my own choices, as are you.  We are NOT free to choose the consequences from those choices.

  As I view some of the pictures from your march, I am mortified that someone could think for one minute that I am one of you.  You have chosen to associate yourselves with one another.  I wonder now if you doubt your decision to join in this crusade.    Look at these pictures.  Look at what you have identified yourself as.  You’re proud to be one of the “nasty women” who make history?  (Please know that I realize that women were marching for a variety of different issues.  I will only discuss a few of them in this letter.)



Next, look at this picture I came across:

For the record – I pay attention and I am angry!  I’m angry that you are marching and some of you don’t even know understand what you are marching for.  You think you’re marching for the right to make decisions that concern your body.  (The two that I have heard most is the decision on birth control and abortion.)  If you were paying attention, you would realize that you aren’t losing your ability to have birth control or the choice to have an abortion.  What you are at risk of losing is the right that you currently have for ME to pay for your birth control and abortion.   That is not a right that you should have.  I consider myself a fairly liberal member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints.  While I do not personally believe that abortion is a choice that should be made, I do believe that you have the right to do with your body what you want.  Abortion was legalized in 1973 with the Roe vs. Wade Supreme Court decision.  I do not for one minute think that Mr. Trump carries enough power to reverse this decision.  If that was the case, I would support you in your march.  However, that is not the case! 

What I really want to know is why you think it’s okay to make the choice to put yourself in a position where you are pregnant and suddenly you no longer wish to live with the consequence from your actions? So now you look to me to pay the price to remove that consequence from you.  Maybe, if you were required to pay for the mistakes that you make, there would be a little more thought before you make that choice.  You want to hold Mr. Trump responsible, however, you need to take a good look in the mirror.  You need to be responsible for yourself before you can hold anyone else responsible.  I’m pretty sure Mr. Trump (or Mr. Obama) were not present during the time these actions occurred.    

Another thing that I really boils my blood –  I saw several signs stating that our current president is “Not my president.”  Well, here’s a bit of truth for you.  He really is your president.  You may not have voted for him {and to be real – I didn’t want to vote for him}, but if you are a citizen of the United States, he is your president.  You are welcome to make him not your president, but that would require you to leave the United States and find your home somewhere else.  No one is stopping you from doing that.  Again, that’s a choice that only you can make. 

Under Mr. Obama, many got comfortable receiving a fair amount of support from the government.  Statistics show that at the conclusion of Mr. Obama’s presidency, the United States had a record number of people receiving government assistance.  Before you lash out, I am aware that some of the people on government assistance really need the help.  However, I personally know many that could have taken steps to better their situation, however, they were comfortable in their assistance, and so they did nothing.  I also know many that work very hard for their families and yet still require some government assistance. 

Are you angry because you are now going to have to make changes in your life in order to provide for your family?  I LOVE the idea of having to pass a drug test to receive any sort of government aid.  I LOVE the idea of holding individuals responsible for their welfare.  There are no free passes in this life.

As I have looked at the many benefits I have as a women in this country, I am not treated equal.  I am treated better.  My husband opens my car door.  I don’t think I have ever opened the door for him.  Do you ever wonder why we, as women, don’t open the door for them?  It’s a way for them to show us respect.  The same applies to opening a building door, pulling out your chair, and frankly, paying the check on the first date.  I wonder if you would be so insistent to be equal if you had to pay for all those first or second dates you went on.  I wonder if you would be so loud in your resistance if you were fired as easy as some of the men.  The hard truth is that white men have the least amount of protection in this country.  If a woman is fired, there has to be hard documentation to support the employer’s decision.  The same truth applies to anyone with an ethnic background. 

My final thought is this: do not assume for one minute that you speak for more than just yourself.  That is the grand part of being an American.  If I believed in your quest, I would have joined.  You can only speak for yourself.  Don’t take away my right to speak as a women.  I am hoping that the next few years brings a positive change in America.  As I watch the news, I am terrified by what I see.  We have retreated back into a time when we viewed people as black vs. white or male vs. female.  We are AMERICANS.  That is the most important label that we can wear right now.  If we fail to unite together, we will only destroy this great country that I love.

Blog Change & Warning

Hello friends -

It has been a while.  Not quite 2 years like last time, but still, a while.  I wanted to explain the new blog as well as give you a chance to jump ship.  I have decided to do something different this year.  I signed up for the One Little Word yearlong workshop.  There are a series of activities to help you understand your word and apply it to your life.  Sound crazy?  Maybe.  I never claimed to be sane.

My 2017 OLW* is SING.  Let me explain.  In September, I ventured to Arlington Texas where I attended a TOFW with some of my favorite people.  One of the talks pierced my heart.  I could easily say that my word, sing, chose me.  The talk was given by Sandra Turley.  I have heard her speak before and in 2013 she directly answered the question burning in my heart.  Side track with me for one minute - One thing that she said that was amazing is this: "Be worth knowing rather than well known."  She also quoted Rob Garner saying "God gave us voices so we must sing."  We can read Mother Mary's Psalm in Luke Chapter 1.  Sandra asked us what our Psalm or song would sound like.  It was then that I realized that as we live our life, we are writing our life song.  What good is a song if it sits on a shelf, unsung and unplayed?  It is no good.  So, this year, I will sing my song.  

I have been fearful in the past to sing my song.  Why?  I don't want to sound like I am bragging, seeking attention, upstaging, or downplaying others.  I was afraid others would feel inferior after hearing my story.  One quick example - Aaron recently received an award at work.  He works extremely hard and it was SO fabulous seeing him receive recognition for his devotion and dedication to his job and his patients.  I found my self afraid of someone getting their feelings hurt or think  that I think any less of them because they didn't get an award or recognition.  I hope this makes sense.  I feel like I am just rambling.  

I also am fearful that my thoughts and opinions that contradict yours will be seen as forceful and ignorant.  We don't have to share the same opinions on everything to be friends.  There are things that I feel strongly about and you feel very strongly about the opposite side of that same scenario.  I support and love you for who you are and by doing so, support your right to voice your opinion.  We still remain friendly and supportive.  Please support my choice to voice my opinion.  By doing so, it does NOT lessen my support of you and your rights.  It's just my feelings and beliefs.  

I am giving you an opportunity to jump ship, or change the station, if you don't want to hear my song.  My feelings won't be hurt.  I just refuse to let my fear dictate my thoughts and actions.  I will not let fear win!  By me sharing our accomplishments, activities, everyday life, and hard times, please remember this - I am not putting you down or trying to lift myself up.  I am simply sharing my story.  The amazing thing about this life is success and happiness is not like a pie.  With a pie, there is only so much to go around.  That is not the case with success and happiness.  It's like air.  There is plenty to go around.  I have a challenge for you - share your song.  Not just with me but the world.

You may notice that the blog name has changed.  The former blog - The Lewis Dudes - was created before Little Miss Maggie was born or even a twinkle in our eye.  {That was 8 years ago}  She came into our lives and I just could never come up with a blog name that I felt fit.  Well, I have found it now.  Sassy's Song.  This blog will serve several purposes.  I will share the good, the bad, and the ugly.  I will share successes of my husband and kids {and sometimes me}, I will share my thoughts and feelings of things going on in the world (I have a post already brewing in my mind!}, I will share the struggles that I face, and I will testify of things I know to be true.

Friends, we can believe different things and still be friends.  That is the beauty of living in America.  I support you.  I want you to be happy.  I want to make myself happy.  The way that I am going to do that this year is to sing my song.  One of my favorite things about the thought of singing my song is that often there is more than one voice singing a song.  There is harmony and blending.  That is you.  You can help me sing my song, and at the same time, sing yours.  A song is a beautiful thing.  I cry at songs more than I do anything else.  Songs can provoke SO much emotion in a short period of time.  A good song can bring the spirit into my heart faster than anything else.

I leave you with one final thought.  During Sandra Turley's talk, she said this - "We must not be swayed and we must NOT be silent."  Your being silent doesn't benefit anyone.  Please join me in choosing to SING!

*{OLW} = One Little Word - this will probably be seen throughout the 2017 year.